If my ultra-Republican, ultra-Catholic neighbors were in charge of publishing the Maine Sunday Telegram, the headline would undoubtedly read, "Smart Parents Warn Their Children: Vote Democrat and Die."
This is basically what they told the kid the other day when she was over playing kickball with No Neck and Future Tranny Nanny (my fabulous neighbor came up with great new nicknames for them....I effing love her). So here is the conversation that ensued with the kid who so loves Obama, as evidenced here and here.
Syd: Who are you voting for?
Us: You already know that. Who are YOU voting for?
Syd: Well, no one now...*sigh*....
Us: Why not?
Syd: When I was playing with No Neck and Tranny Nanny (she doesn't really use those names - I swear!) their parents told me that if I vote for Obama, he's going to bring the war over here and all of us will die. I don't want to die, so I guess I'm not going to vote now.
At this point, I nearly spit out my food because I was laughing so hard. So, the boy and I tried to explain the difference between Republican's and Democrats, and how some people are so committed to their party designation that they'll vote for that person, no matter what.
She asked a little bit about, well, how do you know who to pick, who's going to break their promise, which party is better, what would she be when she grew up......we told her that she had to make her own decisions based on what she read and what she could find out for herself. She couldn't make a decision based on what other people told her.
She had a puzzled look, and as I tempered my anger about them scaring the holy hell out of her, the boy came up with the perfect analogy; this is one of the things I love most about him: his uncanny ability to relate information to her so she can understand it.
The Boy: "Ok, it's kind of like American Idol - The Republicans are Simon and the Democrats are Randy Jackson."
Syd: "So, who's Paula Abdul?"
The Boy: "She's Ralph Nader."
Dear Lord, who knows what will become of her now.
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